My use of drugs has been very two-sided; I want to praise them for seemingly helping me to look past myself and structure some form of happiness eventually. However I don’t think that is, at all really true, if anything it has aided my ability to be content with being apathetic and loveless towards myself and most importantly, others. A substance such as dextromethorphan is prone to provoke feelings of detachment, vulgar language to use would be ‘a fuck-it attitude’; even weeks after using an average amount I’ll notice the feeling linger on me. Depression, though having dealt with it far before ever using a drug as recreational, for me has gotten distressingly worse lately, so far so, that short of being medicated I find life to be sickening to live. Somehow I look at DXM as ‘helping’ in a sick sense of the word to avoid dealing with these feelings, which is a very, very bad idea to pursue; it’s unhealthy and ultimately limiting my ability to live.
(I’ve been using for many years now, over seven. Since starting to abuse substances I’ve tried most everything under the sun, yet still find myself plain addicited to escape, and for me DXM provides that. My doses anymore are typically 900mg - 1,500mg)